I’ve been here before.
I’ve stared at this door so often.
I’ve been trying really hard to step right through it
I SWEAR!
But wait.
Is it really this door I shall walk through?
Or would there be a better one?
Am I becoming some mediocre bums as I hesitate asking such petty questions?
What if I regret choosing this door?
What makes me think the time is now?
How will I know all that?
HOW?
But wait.
Is it just part of my naive fantasy?
Or is it just part of my sophisticated fallacy?
Either way, either way…
A shake of my head, and with it goes my motivation
A release of my sigh, and with it comes my insulation
Tomorrow I say to myself
Tomorrow I shall not betray myself
Oh come on really?
You believe that hardly?
Nothing will ever change, it’s just a repeat of what was before.
Even if something is new, it will revert to a pattern there was before.
But wait.
Is it just part of my horrific cynicism?
Or is it just part of my pragmatic realism?
Either way, either way…
A shake of my head, and with it goes my will
A release of my sigh, and with it comes my guilt
It is not worth it I say to myself
It is not worth any of myself
Wave after wave
Over and across I go
To what end I don’t know
Under and through I dare
To what depth I don’t care
Every ocean wave is unique and never the same
However familiar, I shall assume never the same
It is never ending until I relinquish it, give no more to it
It is forever swelling and dwindling, doesn’t matter I fight it or roll with it
Every “wave”, as it were, ever the unique, never the perfect
I am change
Change is me
Wave after wave
Over and across I go
Under and through I dare
With hope and fear
With triumph and defeat
With joy and sorrow